Tuesday, May 26, 2015

The new virus in town and The PPMEA Syndrome

I see a new virus in town..
It is real..
It is spreading fast..
And it is here to stay...
It is called the PPMEA Syndrome..

Here are some of the effects:
You wake up in the morning and send "Hello. Good morning" to all the Whatsapp groups you are a member of, but don't even smile at your family with whom you shared your bed

You are thinking of wearing a pink dress, and create a poll on FaceBook asking your friends if pink is the color for you, when your sister is right there telling you that pink looks best on you

You have breakfast and don't even know what you are eating, but have to click a photo and share on Pinterest / Instagram! And when others like / comment and ask you for the recipe, then you see what your mom has cooked for you

You are driving to work, and share a quote which reads "Do a random good day today" when there is a puppy dog whining in pain right next to your car, howling for some help. You ignore the puppy and just drive into work because you are late

You reach work and respond to a mail which is neither urgent nor important, and ignore phone calls from your parents / spouse / friends when they are trying to reach you for something urgent / important

You are in a  work meeting, and are anxiously looking at your FaceBook / Whatsapp messages without even acknowledging the ideas / suggestions from your team because you think that all the action / ideas come from social media

You are watching TV, and simultaneously checking LinkedIn updates because there is just so much happening in the digital world, that you miss your child share the highlights of her day

You are so tired and go off to sleep saying "Good Night" as your WhatsApp status that you forget to kiss your kids Good-Night!

Have you been through any of this?

So PPMEA stands for Physically present but Mentally and Emotionally Absent.
Sound familiar? 
Are you affected by this virus?
Do you know anyone who is affected by this virus?

Heard of any anti-viral remedies to help deal with it?

Just as I was about to publish this post, a friend called
She: What are you doing?
Me: I'm writing a post on the PPMEA syndrome
She : What's that?
Me: PPMEA stands for Physically Present, Mentally and Emotionally Absent
She : Sound like a SL*T at work
Me : Speechless

What do you think? Leave a comment to let me know!

Tuesday, May 19, 2015

"New-age Parenting" | What is that?

Now a days, I come across a lot of literature and buzz on "new age parenting".  Honestly, I did not understand what these words really meant - Is it parents of the new age? i.e., really about the era you are parents in? Or is it really about the "man and women" truly being equal partners at home and the workplace?

I did not find a conclusive answer till I heard these words - "New Age Parenting is about the mom and dad being able to effectively replace each other in "doing" every day stuff for the kids" - Be it changing diapers, buying stuff for the kids, cooking their meals, feeding them, sending them to school, getting homework done, monitoring their TV / digital activities, taking them to the movies, baking a cake with them, etc. Wow! I thought to myself... But how many of these parents exist? How many do you know?

As I look around me - I broadly see that there are many categories of new age parents

The New Age Mom - who can really do everything the father can on a daily basis for the kids - from ferrying kids around, to playing a sport with the kids, to being the couch potato in front of the TV! Most educated / working mothers (whose spouse is supportive and empowers his wife) fall in this category

The New Age Dads - who are the hands-on dad's and can change diapers, cook the kids meals and send them to school. A very small percentage of dad's actually fall in this category

The Traditional Mom - who defines her boundary to be confined to the 4-walls within the house, and everything outside is the man's responsibility. She does everything at home, and does not even make an attempt to know / push the envelope. A large part of the cause may be her upbringing or the marital set-up she is in.

The Traditional Dad - whose role definition is to earn and provide for the family. Once at home, he will not do anything. Many times it is because of the way he has been brought up and his belief system of what a man should do, and what a woman should do. Even the 'intent' to contribute does not exist - no matter what! And he sees nothing wrong with that because he knows no other way! If asked to help, he will say he cannot / will not do it / not interested - and walk away! When things get out of hand, he will say "I can't do it. If you don't want to do it - Hire help and get it done"

As I sign-off, I'd like to hear from you on what type of parenting do you see around you? Leave a comment to let me know..

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Connect with me on Nischala’s Social World
Columnist / Byline in : Economic Times | Huffingtonpost | Business2Community | WomensWeb | Sheroes India | PeopleMatters | YoWoTo | 12Most.com | Parentous
Blog : Nischala’s Space, Thoughts, Expressions [Featured in Top Marketing Blogs in India, Directory of Best Indian Blogs, Alltop]
Twitter : @nimu9 [Featured among Sheroes Must Follow Indian Women on Twitter (2014) , 50 Indian Women to follow on Twitter(2012)]

Interviews and Media Mentions
Newspaper Interview | Twittering Heights (Deccan Chronicle, 2015)
Quoted in “Open Letter to Women looking for job
Quoted in “The Best Advice you’ll receive as young women starting your careers
Interview | My blogging journey – How it came to be?
Interview | A wise Blogger
Interview | Secrets to Successful Blogging
Quoted in “Are entrepreneurs born or made?”

Tuesday, May 12, 2015

Life Lessons from 5 Days of a Digital Detox Diet

A few weeks ago, unexpected circumstances coupled with personal choices compelled me to stay-away from the digital world for a day. So really what it meant was - no mails, no FaceBook, no Twitter, no Whatsapp... And really very limited mobile phone usage also.

I was unsure how I would live through the day. But at the end of the day - I felt WONDERFUL! So I thought "Why not extend this state of being for 5 days?" and the deal was sealed. There just was one hitch - Given that a lot of my professional responsibilities as a new age (digital) marketer compel me to be 'digitally connected' and the fact that I love social media and blogging - made it seem that it would be tough to honor the self-made deal.. Nevertheless, I was determined to make an attempt. And I did manage to be on a Digital Detox Diet for almost 5 days.

The whole experience was an eye-opener; and also made me realize so many things about myself, digital / social media, people, relationships, and life itself.

In this post, I am sharing the life lessons I took away at the end of this diet

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Connect with me on Nischala’s Social World
Columnist / Byline in : Economic Times | Huffingtonpost | Business2Community | WomensWeb | Sheroes India | PeopleMatters | YoWoTo | 12Most.com | Parentous
Blog : Nischala’s Space, Thoughts, Expressions [Featured in Top Marketing Blogs in India, Directory of Best Indian Blogs, Alltop]
Twitter : @nimu9 [Featured among Sheroes Must Follow Indian Women on Twitter (2014) , 50 Indian Women to follow on Twitter(2012)]

Interviews and Media Mentions
Newspaper Interview | Twittering Heights (Deccan Chronicle, 2015)
Quoted in “Open Letter to Women looking for job
Quoted in “The Best Advice you’ll receive as young women starting your careers
Interview | My blogging journey – How it came to be?
Interview | A wise Blogger
Interview | Secrets to Successful Blogging
Quoted in “Are entrepreneurs born or made?”

Monday, May 11, 2015

Dear Mr. Maslow – Does your “hierarchy of needs” apply to the “Working Mom”?


I think I first came across the Maslow’s hierarchy of needs as a teenager. The theory fascinated me a great deal as it put an over-arching framework to human motivators, behaviors and life itself!

For those who don’t know, Maslow wanted to understand what motivates people. He believed that people possess a set of motivation systems unrelated to rewards or unconscious desires. Maslow (1943) stated that people are motivated to achieve certain needs. When one need is fulfilled a person seeks to fullfil the next one, and so on. The earliest and most widespread version of Maslow's (1943, 1954) hierarchy of needs includes five motivational needs, often depicted as hierarchical levels within a pyramid.

maslow's hierarchy of needs five stage pyramide
This five stage model can be divided into basic (or deficiency) needs (e.g. physiological, safety, love, and esteem) and growth needs (self-actualization).The deficiency, or basic needs are said to motivate people when they are unmet. Also, the need to fulfil such needs will become stronger the longer the duration they are denied. For example, the longer a person goes without food the more hungry they will become.

One must satisfy lower level basic needs before progressing on to meet higher level growth needs. Once these needs have been reasonably satisfied, one may be able to reach the highest level called self-actualization.[Src : SimplyPsychology]

Ever since I became a working mother myself, I can’t help but ponder on the application of the hierarchy of needs apply to the working mom.

As I look at all the working mothers around me, I’m fascinated by some of the observations I see –
Almost all working mothers I know compromise of one of these needs – sleep (or adequate rest), food (or eating healthy) , clothes (or personal grooming if you will) or sex! 

And based on the women at work survey I did, the key reasons for women to work is to leverage their knowledge and skills, to be productive and for financial independence.


So in an attempt to reach the "Esteem stage", these women appear to be short-circuiting / fast-tracking the "Psychological / Safety / Social" stage of life. In the long run, this is sure to have impact in their life?

What do you think? Leave a comment to let me know

Sunday, May 10, 2015

A round-up of my best "Mummy" posts for Mother's Day!


So Mother's Day is on Sunday (10 May 2015)! According to Wikipedia, Mother's Day is a modern celebration honoring one's own mother, as well as motherhood, maternal bonds, and the influence of mothers in society. It is celebrated on various days in many parts of the world - most commonly in the months of March and May! Social media is abuzz on whether mother's need a special day to celebrate motherhood. Of course, NO! Once you are a mother, you will always be a mother - And no one can take that from you!

If you've read my blogs, you will know that several of my posts are related to my journey as a mother. So on the occasion of Mother's Day, I'm sharing a round-up of my best "Mummy" posts.. I hope you enjoy reading them as much as a I enjoyed writing them! And just so you know, my journey as a writer / blogger began at the same time as my journey as a mother - So both are somewhat co-related and dear to me!

The 12 Most Wonderful Moments in the 1st year of Motherhood [My 1st ever post which went viral, and was shared by Hollywood celebs :) ]

What it means to be a Mother?

Will you let "HER" fly?

My Secret Wishlist for my Girls

A 3 year old and Gandhiji's 3 Monkeys

The Ultimate pre-parenting Checklist Manifesto

P's in my life.. and Parenting

The 3 Most Difficult Lessons to teach your children

The positive changes motherhood brings

Are you ready to be a mother?

My Mum is better than yours

Who is your child's anchor?

Mummies and Worries - Born Together

The Most Common Parenting Mistakes - Are you making them too?

Oh! Maternal Love - Where art thou?

What will be your parental value 50 years from now?

In some ways, we end up like our parents

Dear Mama / Papa - Please give me a good name

——————————————————————————————————————————————
Connect with me on Nischala’s Social World
Columnist / Byline in : Economic Times | Huffingtonpost | Business2Community | WomensWeb | Sheroes India | PeopleMatters | YoWoTo | 12Most.com | Parentous
Blog : Nischala’s Space, Thoughts, Expressions [Featured in Directory of Best Indian Blogs, Alltop]
Twitter : @nimu9 [Featured among Sheroes Must Follow Indian Women on Twitter (2014) , 50 Indian Women to follow on Twitter(2012)]

Interviews and Media Mentions
Newspaper Interview | Twittering Heights (Deccan Chronicle, 2015)
Quoted in “Open Letter to Women looking for job
Quoted in “The Best Advice you’ll receive as young women starting your careers
Interview | My blogging journey – How it came to be?
Interview | A wise Blogger
Interview | Secrets to Successful Blogging
Quoted in “Are entrepreneurs born or made?”