Friday, January 28, 2011


One of the most unpleasant, unnecessary and negative human emotion is anger. Anger is really a manifestation of anything / anyone not being up to our expectations – It could range from someone not returning your call, to someone missing a deadline, to someone saying something which was contradictory to your viewpoint, to … The list is almost endless…

Most of us experience anger in some form and to some extent in our day to day lives. While experienced in moderation, it can actually serve as a positive catalyst enabling one to conduct our lives better. However, anger in extreme is a very inhibiting emotion – One which influences many dimensions in our life. It has a direct impact on one’s physical health and over all well being. It also adversely influences our relationships. It can also affect our professional growth and success. Not to mention the loss in peace of mind. And then of course, the stress that it adds to your own life and the lives of those around you.

Over the past several years, I have observed several people “tame their anger”. And it has almost magical results in every sphere of life – ranging from improved health to healthy relationships to professional growth and success to an overall sense of physical, mental and emotion well-being.

Here’s what I learnt about anger and how to control anger
• It is important to re-calibrate and set realistic expectations – Both of yourself and of those around you. And it is even more important to communicate the same. Somewhere along to way, I wonder why we assume that we don’t need to express and communicate ourselves. In today’s time and age, it is all the more important to clearly articulate yourself
• Have an instant “anger mantra” – Something which you can use anywhere & at any time; and which will immediately calm you down. Use this every time you think you are getting angry. This could be anything from thinking about someone you feel very positively about, to listening to your favorite music, to deep breathing – Choose what works for you.
• When you are in a state of anger, do not say / do anything which you may regret later. So it’s better to postpone / exit whatever you were doing
• Regular physical exercise (specially the cardio work-outs like running, etc.) release pent-up emotions and energy, specially the negative ones. This will definitely aid in controlling your anger over the long term
• Regular Meditation helps in controlling the mind and thoughts
• Give yourself “Me-Time” regularly. To pursue any interest of your choice which is close to your heart
• Spending a few minutes a day in silence – in thought, in reflection and in serenity is excellent. And especially if you are very angry, it is important to be aware of what triggers the anger and what you are so angry about. Over a period of time, you will be easily able to identify the sensitive issues. Once you are cognizant of them, it is easy to take the required steps to prevent and control the same

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