I am stumped when healthy, well educated individuals from good well-to-do families and leading reasonably decent lives say “Life’s not fair” - when faced with the first challenge, an unexpected hurdle, unanticipated circumstance, unplanned event or minor ailment..
Case 1: A 6 month old baby undergoing hemo dialysis 3 times a week due to impaired renal functions. A kidney transplant is planned in her future, but then organ transplantation in India has its own set of challenges. The physical ordeal that the baby must be going through is saddening. But imagine what the baby’s family must be going through? If they say, “Life’s not fair” – I would agree.
Case 2: An old man in his 70’s and retired from the armed forces lying in a 3 X 6 bed in a war veteran home. The room is infected with bugs, cockroaches, rodents and lizards .Someone who sacrificed his life to safeguard the nation has been disowned by his loved ones. Imagine what he must be feeling and thinking? If he says, “Life’s not fair” – I would agree.
Case 3: One of the most beautiful and graceful women I have ever seen (probably in her 50’s) married to a blind man. I almost said “What a waste of beauty” when I saw the couple for the first time. Imagine how the woman finds the strength to live her life? If she says, “Life’s not fair” – I would agree.
Case 4: A highly qualified ever-so-virtuous and self-disciplined retired executive diagnosed with heart ailments (Coronary Artery Disease and Cardiac arrhythmia), chronic renal failure (Stage IV), hypertension, seizure disorder and gouty arthritis. All his time, energy and money is directed towards his treatment and recovery. And he has to make thousands of lifestyle changes purely for his existence – from diet, to travel, to sleep, etc. Imagine what he must be going through every day? Imagine how his family must be living every day of their lives? If any of them said, “Life’s not fair” – I would agree.
Case 5: An ever so dynamic person I know (who had decided to remain single) married at the age of 45. In 3 years, he lost his kidneys to diabetes. And that was followed by amputation of his leg. Imagine what he must be going through physically and mentally? And imagine what his wife must be experiencing in her day to day life as she devotes it to his service? If any of them said, “Life’s not fair” – I would agree.
I have intentionally stuck to the ones involving physical / material manifestations – simply because they are the easiest to describe and possibly also the easiest to comprehend.
And I can go on writing.
Do you think any of the above people anticipated, expected or planned their lives this way?
And today I was randomly reading random blogs of random people when I came across these words “Pain is given, Suffering is a choice.”. But what if, just what if something chooses you?
I have struggled for several years to make peace with the diversity and dichotomy of these many lives…And to do whatever I can in my own way to help bridge this gap. And the struggle continues…
So the next time you say "Life's not fair..." , Just think "Is life really not fair?"