Monday, September 5, 2011

Ask and You shall Get..

Over the recent past, I have been in situations where things did not go the way I wished simply because I did not ask. I wondered why many of us feel inhibited to ask – Be it with our parents, spouses, children, at work, friends, neighbors, strangers, etc. etc. etc.

Among the many reasons could be that - it is a personality characteristic (that one feels inhibited to ask), some past experiences when things ended unfavorably when we asked, upbringing (we were taught not to ask), over analysis (in terms of what others will think about us and how it will impact the relationship), we think it is inappropriate to ask (either the wrong timing or the wrong person)…

What I’ve learnt (and some lessons the hard way) is:
• If you ask, many times you get what you want; sometimes even more than what you expect!
• Be clear and precise when you ask something from others; most people do not understand cryptic requests, clues or long-winded requests. Be polite and courteous, but most importantly specific in your request
• If you don’t ask, you will probably not get what you want. So ask!
• It is perfectly fine to ask for what you want. Of course, when and whom you choose to ask is your discretion
• If others refuse your request, its fine – As if you always got what you wanted in life!
• If someone refuses your request once, does not mean that they will always refuse your request. Try not to take it personally!
• Many times, neither do others know nor can they guess what’s in your mind. Hence it is necessary to explicitly put forth your request – Just ask!
• It is better to ask, than not to ask
• And if there is an emotional reason for your request, briefly mention it along with your request. It is likely to strike a chord with others and they will most likely oblige :)

No comments:

Post a Comment